Friday, November 13, 2009

Livial.....The diary part 1.

Since starting this new HRT, I have mixed feelings. I know that I have to take it for 3 months to get the full effect of the drug, and to determine whether it is going to help. At the moment, I have sore muscles, rage spikes, and terrible fatigue. In saying that, my mood seems better and I will be interested to see how it effects my hormone levels long-term.

Livial is an interesting medication in a class of its own. Livial tablets contain the active ingredient Tibolone, which is a synthetic steroid medicine used for HRT. It mimics the activity of the female sex hormones oestrogen, progesterone and the androgen testosterone in the body(netdoctor-http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/medicines/100001519.html). It is said to have less risk of the possibility of breast cancer, with all the goodies of the traditional HRT in relieving the symptoms of hormone changes.

Of course, there are risks in taking any medication and the risks of blood clots, stroke, spotting etc. are stated very clearly in all information I have accessed. The information does specifically state the risk of breast cancer with all HRT, but one of the reasons I was given it to take for my symptoms was that it was implied that the risk was less with Livial. I don't think that there are any studies just yet on the difference between Livial and other conventional form of HRT. I have not searched deeply enough. And lets face it, do you not take it just because you MAY get breast cancer or stroke? How do you measure your quality of life while not taking something to relieve the symptoms? I would claw my way through concrete to feel better. The honest truth.

Mammograms, breast checks and self-checking regularly are a must. I am a smoker which is probably not a good thing. I have not been able to exercise vigorously for a number of reasons. I am a candidate for a heart attack for sure. I eat well, I take fish oil, I do not drink and I am not giving up my cigarettes for anyone. I have made enough concessions in my life. The exercise is a concern though as my bionic, gym-obsessed mother will testify. I agree with her and thats the path I want to be on. I want to be able to walk for miles without fire in my joints and a terrible feeling of vertigo and weakness. Yep, I got a long way to go.

So, in my second week of taking the Holy Grail, I feel sick in the guts, fuzzy in the head and just a little hesitant. I have to temper physicality with psychology. What is my fevered and terrified mind telling my body about this drug? When even food feels toxic sometimes, it is hard to convince your brain that this med is a GOOD thing. That eventually(hopefully) things will change. I will get my virility back, my brain fog will lift, my spelling skills and memory will come back......and ultimately my IQ will go back to where it was. I will be able to run, climb and stretch. I will be able to feel EMPOWERED.....I will be able to participate without the constant banking of energy with withdrawals outweighing deposits. I will be able to LIVE.

I got high hopes for this little tablet.....don't let me down.